Better, Closer, Warmer

Two weeks ago Isaac agreed to run with me and the KMA people at the park on Saturday morning. I was proud of how he did but having him there slowed my time a bit. I ran 3 laps in 15:26.
Last Saturday he declined to join me. I was very close to changing my mind about going but went through the motions. I got there and started to feel good. And when I started running I felt even better. I could feel that I was running at a faster pace more comfortably than before. I was feeling so good I contemplated running a fourth lap, but chickened out. I ran 3 in 14:56! My best time yet!
So next week I will challenge myself to run the whole two miles. We'll see how my pace is.
I wasn't able to go to class on Saturday because we opted to go to a Tot Shabbat/Open House at Temple Judea that overlapped.
But this morning I did a Yoga Hike in Griffith Park with Stef. Awe-some!
A great, slightly challenging hike with beautiful weather, spectacular views and enjoyable company.

Last week I started learning more of Dan Gun. I'm really looking forward to more of that!

Taking The Long View

Last Saturday I was able to resume running with the KMA peeps.
I checked in, stated I would run three laps, and proceeded on "go" with the group. My first lap was 5:02. My second was at 10:06. This surprised me that I kept the same pace. I didn't know I could be that consistent. But the third lap was hard. I thought, I'm going to have to walk some of this. I won't quit, but I don't think I'm going to be able to make it all the way around again running.
I kept envisioning the words, "I am here," a new image that came to me recently. It's very clear in my mind and in fact the letters are vertical when I envision them. That helped me keep going. Or rather, it helped me stay present while my legs kept going, instead of thinking about how hard it was and how much further I had to go.
What also helped was one of the young high school black belt women. She was mentoring someone younger than herself who is, apparently, trying to qualify for black belt. I heard her say to her mentee, 'lengthen your stride.'
I hadn't remembered ever hearing those words before. But I gave it a try (even though she wasn't talking to me). It made a real difference! I felt like I was covering at least the same amount of ground but expending less energy.
Before I knew it, I was rounding the last corner. I hadn't walked, though I had slowed down a bit. But I picked it up for the finish. I turned on the juice. I sprinted to the finish and crossed at 15:00 flat.
Wow! What a great feeling!
This is why I keep training.
To discover that I CAN keep going is profoundly empowering.
I'm trying to get that into my bones.

What The Universe Told Me

The Universe theuniverse@tut.com via tut.ccsend.com
to me I get emails from The Universe every day with cool sayings, reminders, inspiration. This one came the other day. When I read it the first time I was thinking about my business, Baby Signs® With Barbara. Upon rereading it, I was thinking about earning a black belt...and that really felt right. Thanks, Universe!

Barbara, the top 10 signs a really huge dream of yours is about to come true, are: 10. You regularly visualize the end result, the after-party, or beyond. 9. Every day you "show up," doing something about it. 8. You're not attached to how it will come true. 7. It really matters to you; you really care. 6. You know who the first 3 people are that you'll call with the news. 5. You're smiling and winking way more than normal. 4. Sometimes you speak and behave as if it already has. 3. It probably doesn't depend upon specific people. 2. You already know what your next goal is. 1. You keep whispering, "Sweet! Thank you! Yes!" with clutched fist. Sweet! Thank you! Yes!     The Universe

ORANGE!

I graded today and earned my orange belt!

I felt nervous all day. There were a few reasons: 

1. I didn't know of any classmates who were also grading today. I got behind my peers. They earned their orange belts last month. 

2. I didn't know if Aaron was going to make it.

3. Aside from Extreme Combinations #1 and #2, I didn't know what I would be asked to demonstrate. 

Aaron texted me in the afternoon and said it didn't look good for him to be able to make it out of work in time for the 6pm ceremony. I didn't realize until then that I really wanted him there. 

I was reflecting on a conversation with Isaac in the car the day before when he said he'd rather be able to stay home and watch TV because that's more fun. I told Isaac that my feelings were hurt by that. I reminded him that it's important to cheer on our teammates and that it would make me feel good if he was there.  (That was the end of the discussion simply because we had pulled into the garage by then and it was time to get out.)

I had a disappointing realization about myself while I was warming up and waiting for the ceremony to begin. I noticed that there were four kids with yellow belts who would also be grading. The thought that I'd be asked to demonstrate WITH them made me sad and intimidated. It felt awkward. Then a peer did arrive who was testing for yellow. That made me feel infinitely better. What was disappointing was realizing that apparently I needed to be better (know more) than someone else in order to feel good about myself. 

That didn't feel very "martial arty." 

I will allow for an evolution of that attitude to be part of my Black Belt journey. 

Low block

Chambering for inner block

Inner block

Orange!

Proud of myself and my teammates

Thanks to my parents for being there to support me and, perhaps even more importantly, take care of the kids! Thanks for taking these pics, Pops!